Why We Write: Billy Smith
Read the newest public submission from a blcklst.com writer!
Why We Write is back with another new piece from Billy Smith. Check out his projects OUR THEATER IS DEAD and SYD VS. DEATH on blcklst.com!
Take it away, Billy!
To say that I’ve loved movies for as long as I can remember would be an understatement. Movies are my favorite thing, and I’ve spent my entire life trying to get as close to them as possible.
When I was young, the theater was where I always wanted to be. Other kids wanted to go to a ball game, or to go camping, or to go on a vacation. They dreamed of being in Disney World. I was completely content at a matinee show with some popcorn and a drink. It didn’t get better than being in a dark auditorium and being transported to an exciting world. I loved movies so much that I began to think of my own. I didn’t have a camera, but I still spent hours scripting my own movies with my action figures. At that time, it was enough for the stories to just be in my head.
I craned my neck when our car passed the theaters. I tried to get a glimpse at the posters and read what was on the marquee. I was dreaming of my next trip to the cinema.
Eventually, though, just going to a movie on special occasions wasn’t close enough. I wanted more. I knew, without a doubt, that I wanted to work at a theater. When I turned sixteen, I got my wish.
I was as close to the movies as I ever could have dreamed. I could watch as many movies as I wanted, for free, and I sure took full advantage of it. I was constantly around and even working with people who shared my passion for movies. I could smell the popcorn every day and there was always an opportunity to watch something. I knew that this was my world. I was home.
Being in that environment inspired me. I stopped keeping my script ideas contained in my head and I started writing them down. It was just for fun. Just a hobby that I passed the time with.
Then, the theater was taken away from me. Closed because someone who had never even been there decided that it wasn’t worth keeping open. I had to help shut down the place that I loved. I watched as it was taken apart piece by piece and left to rot.
I was lost without the theater and I was desperately trying to find my way back to the movies, but I found myself working at a new job that couldn’t have been further away from them. I had difficulty finding time and money to go to the theater. I felt like I had been robbed of the thing that made me happy.
In my times of longing, I turned to working on my scripts more. It made me feel closer to the cinema. My writing was improving and I started to think it might be more than a fun hobby. I started to think that I needed to do it.
Miraculously, the universe gave me a second chance. A new theater opened near me. I was hired to work there and I wasn’t just sweeping popcorn this time. I became a cinema manager. All those years later, that little kid who just wanted to go to the theater more than anything was now running one. I was in charge of the posters and displays. I ordered the concession items. I even finally got to learn how the projectors worked and got to put the movies on the screens for the audiences myself. I stayed after work and watched whatever I wanted. I was back where I belonged.
My responsibilities were bigger and I started dreaming bigger, too. I felt that my screenwriting skills had improved and more story ideas started coming together in my mind. Running those projectors and watching the audience reactions, I started to wonder if my scripts could find their way to the big screen, too. More importantly, I started to believe. I found myself obsessed with the stories that I was writing.
Then, lightning struck for the second time. A decision was made by someone who couldn’t care less. The theater was closed. Once again, the theater was taken away from me and I had to help put it down. The industry had spit me out again and I was lost — mentally and financially. The sudden closure of the theater caused me to lose everything.
Now, I work a miserable third shift stocking job. The color and excitement that I once had in my life is gone. It’s just the same products going on the same shelves every single night. I have no car and no extra money, so I can’t go to the movies.
My first theater was demolished and reduced to rubble — as if it never existed.
And my second theater? The building I put nine years into? I have to pass it on my walk home from work every morning. That’s how my days start. It’s been gutted, painted a garish color and turned into an indoor go-kart track. It makes me sick to my stomach. Unfortunately, I can see it from my back yard. So close, but yet, I have never felt as far away from the movies as I am now.
I keep writing, though, and I have never believed in myself and my stories more. I have been thinking to myself that, perhaps, it’s okay that the theaters are gone. Maybe that was how it was supposed to go because working there inspired me and got me as close to the movies as I’ve ever been, but it still wasn’t close enough.
Now, more than ever, I know why I write. I have to do it because I’m trying to be as close to the movies as possible, as I have done my whole life. After all, what could ever get me closer to the movies than actually playing a part in creating my own?
Thanks to Billy!
Billy Smith is an Ohio-based screenwriter. A lover of film from a very young age, he spent fifteen years working in movie theaters. The experience deeply influenced him and inspired him to pursue screenwriting and tell stories of his own. Billy has developed a passion for stories that balance cinematic spectacle with emotional honesty. His work blends horror, comedy, action, and heartfelt character dynamics inspired by the films that shaped him growing up.
More Why We Write:
Jainaba M. Seckan on creating through loss and finding new purpose
Brandon Carbaugh on writing for his beloved brother
Ben Mehlman on the power of slowing down
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